Vienna Girardi Mourns Twins She Lost to Miscarriage on What Would’ve Been Their Due Date

Vienna Girardi is anguish the twin girls she mislaid to miscarriage on a day she was awaiting to accommodate them for a initial time.

On Wednesday, what would’ve been The Bachelor alum’s due date, Girardi common a unpleasant feelings she’s had ever given a Aug. 5 genocide of her unborn daughters after experiencing twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome at usually 18-weeks pregnant.

“Today should have been a day to glory and applaud life… currently was my due date,” she wrote on Facebook.

“Instead I’m anticipating it tough to even get out of bed, tough to grin or feel anything during all. we feel dull as we mount outward examination my dogs; it’s soppy and murky as if a universe knows and feels my pain,” Girardi continued.

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“Each day has gotten easier to for me to put a grin on and fake all is ok though not today. we can’t fake today. I’m hurting, I’m unhappy and we feel empty. we still wondering because and we still get indignant and currently I’m insane and unhappy and usually wish it to be ok to feel this way,” she concluded.

In August, Girardi suggested she was hospitalized for dual days during that she attempted “everything to save them,” reduction than a week after celebrating her twins’ gender exhibit on Jul 30 with family and friends.

“The doctors had warned me that if we did not go into labor and broach a babies, we was holding a possibility of risking my possess life and causing an infection in my uterus though they could not tarry during usually 18 weeks,” a former existence star explained.

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“They also pronounced that there was a really slim possibility underneath 5% that a babies could tarry and a fluids in their amniotic sacs feed themselves so as any mom would do we did all to save them though their hearts stopped violence on day dual that is also when we went into a septic startle with 104 fever,” Girardi added.

“My small angels went to Heaven on Aug 5th and we was rushed into a OR for puncture medicine and was in a ICU for 4 days,” she said.

Girardi’s repute Richard Harlow formerly told PEOPLE that Girardi spent 4 days in a ICU after her puncture C-section. “She roughly died,” he said.

“Vienna has a prolonged and strenuous tour to recovery, nonetheless she is clever and knows her children are during rest in heaven,” he shared. “Her heart is heavy. Having cried with her, we can overtly contend this is one of a misfortune things I’ve gifted with my tighten crony and customer of 7 years. It’s a harmful experience. She wants everybody to know how most she desired her small babies.”

Then in November, Girardi seemed on an partial of The Doctors during that she common her fears of destiny miscarriages after traumatically losing her daughters.

“The scariest partial is after we have a miscarriage, we start thinking, ‘Am we never gonna be means to have kids again?’ ” Girardi said, adding that before she went into surgery, she’d been told by doctors she competence not be means to detect in a future.

Girardi has given been told by doctors that she will be means to get pregnant again.